Although you know that you are doing the proper thing, leaving your tiny tot with child care providers can make you feel miserable and guilty. You probably find yourself crying all the way to work especially when your child cries whenever you leave. While it is expected for your kid to be picking up on your stress at separation, it is not unusual for even the caregivers to feel stressed. We will discuss here the ways in which you can handle the stress and help your child adapt to the new routine.
There could be many reasons why your child and you find it difficult to cope with the separation. The most common dread is of being abandoned . The child can also sense your anxiety while you drop him off.
Sometimes, the activities planned by the Child Care Centre may not be appropriate to your child’s interests and temperament.
Also, your kid may not like the food given there, or the large number of children and teachers may be a bit too much for your child to handle. There is of course the more serious possibility of child abuse which is difficult to find out as the child may not confide in you. But, if you feel that the child is unnaturally fearful of being left at the Centre, or cries more than usual, you should not rule out abuse.
It usually takes a child several weeks to adjust to his new situation. So, don’t be anxious if your child persists in crying as he will soon adjust once he realizes that you will be back to pick him up. Some kids who don’t cry at the start may even start crying after a week, a month, or even a year! You just need to keep in mind that it is a common reaction to not being able to control the change in circumstances.
Here are a few tips on how you and your child can deal with Child Care. It will be a good idea to let your child go with you to the Child Care Centre if you are just about to start him on Child Care. You can expose your child to the new environment and make it an exciting thing to look forward to. Stay there for at least a couple of hours so that your child can see the other children participating in activities and games. Also introduce your child to her future caregivers so that when he starts Day Care, he will not feel like he is being handed over to total strangers. This will give some assurance to you and your child as you can see how the caregivers are interacting with the other children.
Initially you should leave your child for just an hour and then slowly step-up by an hour every day until you reach full time as this will gently ease him into the new routine. Make sure you say your byes and leave immediately. If your child cries at separation, do not prolong your departure or overly indulge in consoling the child. You could maybe leave the consoling to the caregiver, which will help their bonding. When you discuss your child’s progress at the Child Care Centre, always use encouraging words and never sound negative or anxious as children easily pick up on their parents’ emotions and react accordingly.
Make sure you keep up a strict time schedule for both drop and pick up. This will help your child become more confident that you will be there to take him home at a specific time. This helps your child to calm down and enjoy the games and activities and also to make friends with the other children. The child will also benefit with carrying a favourite blanket or toy from home to the Day Care Centre.
There are instances where the child could be feeling stressed at the Centre because he is under the care of caregivers who themselves are stressed out. A primary caregiver is very important if your child is a baby or toddler. This aids in the child bonding with one or two adults instead of many strange new faces. Ask for meetings with the caregivers and the management at periodic intervals to keep in touch with your child’s progress. How long does it take for him to stop crying after you are gone? Are they able to distract him and get him involved in other activities? Is he making new friends or is he withdrawn?
Even though quality Child care can never be a replacement forthe warmth, attention, and love your child gets at home, it can be beneficial in several ways including social interaction, exposure to outdoor activities, and access to expensive educational toys, etc. Child Care can definitely work for you and your child with some planning and the right approach.
This article is contributed by Child Care Melbourne.
